Ladies (and Gentlem..en?) I can’t believe it’s September. Really really can’t. I need a pause button on life. I hope I’m not wrong in this but I met Erica Ridley for the first time in person this past July. She’s super fun, and when I grabbed her online I was like “you should guest here!” and since Erica is supergreat, she was like “okay I’m game!” And we emailed about Sir Arthur. (Who doesn’t exist?) So anyway, Erica decided to go with an author interview – and these are my questions and her answers! Enjoy! Continue reading
Hi friends! So we’re well into June [GAH!] – and this birthday month hasn’t felt very celebratory or anything, so I’m hoping that comes about soon. This is another good contribution though – as you see we’ve got Dorothy F. Shaw visiting with us today! She’s a first time guest so everyone give her a warm welcome!! Dorothy opted for an author interview – a style which was unique to ALBTALS when I started asking these zany questions, and it should be good – she’s a lot of fun. 😀 Continue reading
Hi friends! Today we have Patricia Sargeant who also writes as Regina Hart visiting with us! And it’s the first Tuesday of the month, so we’re keeping on with the Guest Author & A Giveaway tradition! I wrote “Part I” at the top because I expect to be updating this with some more information in the near future, so please bear with me. (My mistake for not having all information.) I hope you enjoy the ALBTALBS style interview in the interim! 🙂 Continue reading
Hello friends! Today we have Jessica Scott guesting with us … AND MAN this post would’ve been perfect during Social Media for Social Good … or maybe not? Maybe SMSG is the pressure Jessica is talking about? That’s going to give me a headache/complex – so yeah. Let’s not go there. Anyway – let’s just go ahead with her post, shall we? :X
Why did the ALS Ice Bucket challenge go viral when so many others were not? What was it about that specific challenge – the calling out of your friends on social media to either dump a bucket of water over their head or write a check – that got so many people around the world and from vastly different socio economic backgrounds up off the computer/phone/tablet and into the spirit of it? Continue reading
I absolutely cannot handle the fact that we’re into December. No. Unfortunately, it is what it is. (Which is a phrase I kinda hate but … it’s true, and fitting, and not a “passing the buck” when it comes to time. … Unless you’re Hermione. Or a Time Lord. Which is a Doctor Who thing, right?) Anyway. Today we have the fabulous Miranda Neville guesting with us!!! She has a book out at the end of the month so I decided to pounce on her early. You’re welcome. 😉
She also opted for a [non]traditional ALBTALBS author interview, because why not right? We only have 12 of these a year. If that.
Every single book release you have from here on out will hit #1 on the NYT and USA Today best seller lists. The catch is you can only eat pizza for the rest of your life. You can have regular pizza, and dessert pizza… but it has to be pizza. Do you take that deal? [And what type of pizza would be your “go to”?]
Are you kidding? Of course! My favorite pizzas have vegetables, hold the sausage and pepperoni. I love basil, goat’s cheese and sun-dried tomatoes on a thin crust.
What would your street [nick]name be? why? 😀
Posh Spice. Wait, that’s been taken. Can I be Champagne Neville? I’m not really a motorcycle gang girl. I aspire to bubbly and limos rather than beer and bikes.
You have the opportunity to be part of any TV show for one episode. (One that is on or off the air.) Which one do you pick, and what is your role?
I’ve just glommed the entire two seasons of Alpha House, Gary Trudeau’s Washington sitcom. Janel Moloney (Donna from The West Wing) plays a Tea Party senator in a crazy over-the-top way that looks like she’s having a blast. I’ll be Psycho for a Day.
What’s the most unique/strange silly skill you possess?
I’m very good at lighting bonfires. My friends call me One-Match. Come to think of it, that could be my street name. One-Match Neville.
Your next life you come back as a dog. What breed do you come back as and why?
A bichon frise, because they always seem happy and everyone loves them. But I wouldn’t want the poofed up grooming; keep the fur short, please.
Which celebrity is your “spirit animal?” Why?
Emma Thompson. Because my daughter says so. (I’d never heard of a spirit animal and had to ask her.)
If you were a serial killer, who would be your target? And what would be your MO? [“Calling card,” what memento would you take?] Target = old men, young men, school children, college aged women, etc.
People who weep on reality TV shows. Death by flying object. My calling card would be a photograph of Heidi Klum.
Hostile alien invasion, or zombie apocalypse? Which one do you think is more likely to happen? Which one is scarier?
Alien invasion is more likely but zombies are scarier.
What’s the most interesting thing you’ve ever done for research? what’s the most interesting thing you’ve learned while doing research? In general, or for this book?
May I look into the future? I intend to take a balloon ride in preparation for a book about a Regency balloon race. I can’t really pick one interesting thing, but I can reveal that the Pantheon Opera House, built in London in the 1780s, had mahogany toilet seats in the ladies’ water closet. This fact does not appear in The Duke of Dark Desires.
Which do you choose – walk in pantry, walk in closet, or extra garage space?
Walk in closet.
Can you name at least three US Supreme Court Justices without looking?
Ginsberg, Sotormayor, Kagan, Scalia, Thomas, Roberts, Kennedy…. OK now I need to go check.
How did you come up with your author name?
Neville is a family name. I picked Miranda because I like it.
What was your favorite book as a child?
It changed from year to year with my age. Anne of Green Gables was a perennial favorite.
What is the super power you would most like to have? and least like to have?
Most: Invisibility. Least: X-Ray vision. I’d like to be able to eavesdrop but not to see people naked.
Man I should’ve asked Miranda the spammer question, don’t you think? I bet she would’ve given a super entertaining answer. 😀 So now, it’s up to you. What outrageous and silly question do you have for Ms. Neville? Or you can definitely ask her about her writing and her books. Speaking of, this is the book that will be out on December 30th.
Rebellious Julian Fortescue never expected to inherit a dukedom, nor to find himself guardian to three young half-sisters. Now in the market for a governess, he lays eyes on Jane Grey and knows immediately she is qualified–to become his mistress. Yet the alluring woman appears impervious to him. Somehow Julian must find a way to make her succumb to temptation . . . without losing his heart and revealing the haunting mistakes of his past.
Lady Jeanne de Falleron didn’t seek a position as a governess simply to fall into bed with the Duke of Denford. Under the alias of Jane Grey, she must learn which of the duke’s relatives is responsible for the death of her family–and take her revenge. She certainly can’t afford the distraction of her darkly irresistible employer, or the smoldering desire he ignites within her.
But as Jane discovers more clues about the villain she seeks, she’s faced with a possibility more disturbing than her growing feelings for Julian: What will she do if the man she loves is also the man she’s sworn to kill?
You can order a copy of The Duke of Dark Desires here. And of course, some lucky commenter is going to win her choice of any of Miranda Neville’s backlist. In print or in electronic book form! Whee!
My darlings it is November! How did that happen?! Also, it’s the first Tuesday! >.> Yes. *koffs* So – it’s time for our Guest Author & A Giveaway feature! Today we have Yasmine Galenorn, she’s a first time guest at ALBTALBS so everyone give her a warm welcome! I also loved her answers, and I hope you do too.
So without further ado … your typical ALBTALBS Author Interview with Yasmine Galenorn! \o/
Which would you most like to go to? Ancient Greece, Rome, Egypt, China, Mesopotamia, Africa, or South America? Why?
Um…can I pick Finland? Because I have a special connection there—not by blood but by spirit. If not, then Mesopotamia, because I love the B52’s song. *grins*
Which fairy tale would you most like to be in? Least? Why (for both)?
Most: I’m picking Where the Wild Things Are. YES—I maintain it’s a modern fairy tale! I want to travel with Max to the island and meet the Wild Things. And some times, I want to stay there, because the concept of living on a magical island full of wild creatures who were also malleable sounds like a lot of fun.
Least: Cinderella. I don’t believe in Happily Ever After (though I do believe in Happy For Now), I don’t like housework, and I want my man to be an equal partner, not my rescuer. 😉
What’s the best book you read as a school assignment?
Watership Down. It’s still my favorite book. I absolutely love it, and see it as modern myth. I had to contrast/compare it to the Odyssey in 9th grade. I still cry over the end, no matter how many times I’ve read it, and my favorite character is Fiver.
What do you think about clowns?
Do we even have to go there? *shudders* Have NEVER liked clowns. They freak me out. They invade your boundaries and space and then victim-blame you for being a poor sport when you tell them to back off. I can’t imagine being married to a clown. That would be a deal breaker.
Celebrity/Author death match – who would you most want to take on? [you don’t have to say why ;)]
Oh hell, I dunno. Alyssa Day. Because I love the woman and no matter how it came out, I’d be happy . *laughing*
What did you do with the money from your first royalty check?
Bought a new desk and chair and got my first tattoo! WAY back in 1998.
What items have to be close by when writing & not just the sensible stuff like research notes, but the other perhaps slightly goofy stuff (bowl of m&ms, stuffed animal, stress ball, pot of coffee).
Other than my notebooks, research, Daytimer, dozens of pens and other office supplies…there are a number of trinkets I love but the ONE constant throughout my writing life has been Miss Kitty, the porcelain kitty I’ve had since I was 7 years old (and that is…a little over four decades). I traded a necklace for her at school. She’s been my writing mascot ever since. I have a lot of other baubles and things, but Miss Kitty? She has to be there.
If you had to become a bear, which type would you choose? Why?
I LOVE BEARS I LOVE THIS QUESTION…*calms down* Okay…Brown bear. I love brown bears. The goddess I’m a priestess of created the bear in the Finnish traditions/mythos and names him Otso. Bear is tattooed on my arm. I have three cave bear teeth that are 20,000 years old. I have statues of bears—including a very large one in my yard. I have pictures of bears. I have stuffed bears—I love the Gund Snuffles bears and collect them. Oh, you wanted to know why? Because brown bears are…bears. Isn’t that enough reason?
A twisted fairy offers you perfect health. You’ll never be sick or get a migraine again. The catch is you’ll break a bone every three years until your 75th birthday. Nothing crippling, but still a break. (Anything from a femur to your pinky.) Do you take the offer? why or why not?
Um, sure. Considering that at most, I’d maybe, possibly, live 15 years after 75 years old, that’s five bones and none of them crippling? Okay. Fine. I won’t be going wind surfing or sky diving at that point. That’s fine. Even at my age, if all health concerns magically vanished until I was 75—sure.
If you were to become a spammer, what product would you peddle? And what would your message be? Come up with the most attention getting, creative, crazy thing. Yes, that’s a challenge.
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Tell us two truths and a lie. (The catch is you have to tell us what the lie is later in the comments)
- I lived in a converted school bus and slept with a hatchet by my head.
- I firmly believe I was an Egyptian Pharaoh in an earlier life.
- I never went on a date with any of my boyfriends/girlfriends/husband (and former husband) before I got involved with them romantically.
If you could be a super hero what would your super hero name be? And what would your nemesis be named? What would both of your super powers be?
The Empress of Dark Sparklies. My powers would be the ability to enchant and delight, with the darkest of sparkly magic. And my nemesis would be Grumpy Conservo-Dude, who has the power to drain the magic out of any gathering, and the fun out of any situation.
If you could switch places with someone for 72 hours, whose life would you want to live?
Honestly? Nobody. If I loved it more than my own, I’d regret coming back. If I hated it, I’d never be able to talk to that person again without thinking, “I know too much about what their life is like.”
What five other authors do you think more people need to be reading? (You can assume you’re already on the list ;))
- Shawntelle Madison.
- Kerry Schafer
- Karen Mahoney
- Holly Black (The Coldest Girl in Cold Town is one of my favorites as of late)
- Chloe Neill
Who are you choosing for your zombie apocalypse team? [Real, then fictional?]
- My friend Andrew. He’d be my choice for leader of the pack. If anybody can survive the zombie apocalypse, he can.
- I’d be the brains.
- Samwise—my husband—to run the underground communications/computer network.
- Marc and Andria, my assistants—both strong and handy.
- Carol, one of my best friends.
- Gary Numan—my favorite singer because we’re going to need entertainment. *koffs*celebritycrush*koffs*
- Leonard McCoy from Star Trek: He can cure anything with that tricorder.
- Buffy: because she’s…Buffy.
- Daryl from the Walking Dead: Because besides being eye candy, you have to love a guy who can shoot a good cross bow and have no remorse.
- MacGyver: because he can create ANYTHING.
- Han Solo: because HAN SHOT FIRST!
- Thor: because he’s Thor, any other reason needed?
(Hey, you said ‘team’…to me a team means numbers!)
What a fun interview! But now I want to talk a little about Native American Indian Heritage month, and about how that relates to me. You might not know, but I’m (a significant) part Cherokee. I don’t talk about it much because honestly, I see it as just part of who I am. It doesn’t make me any more special or less special than someone who’s part Norwegian or part African American.
I’m one of those people who are kind of adrift about my family heritage. Most of the rest of my origin is Irish, but the honest truth is this: I don’t know much about a lot of my ancestors. I tried to investigate my Cherokee ancestry but my ancestors weren’t on the government rolls and that makes it difficult to pursue information.
The genealogy of my family wasn’t documented very well and with a great-grandma who outlived eight husbands, nobody really even knows what her original last name was, as far as I know. Our family? Not so close. Add to that, my blood father was my mother’s cousin (a long and involved story there. My mother left my stepfather for very good reasons, got pregnant with me, and then unfortunately went back to him)…and you begin to understand the complicated dynamics involved in my background.
However, I do know this: I grew up in a town where ethnicities weren’t accepted very well. I grew up hearing my stepfather refer to Native Americans as ‘warhoops’ (right in front of my mother and me), and Hispanics as ‘wetbacks.’ It didn’t make me ashamed of my background. In fact, his prejudice only served to make me leave that town and my family as soon as I could.
I also know that when my mother first married my stepfather, Grandma wouldn’t allow Mom to walk through the front door for a couple of years because she was part Cherokee. (Yes, I called—her Grandma. Blood related or not, she actually treated me pretty nicely though everybody knew I wasn’t actually H’s daughter. She didn’t take it out on me like he did—he abused me for just existing.)
Mom was forced to go through the back door or the ‘servant’s entrance.’ After my stepfather finally spoke up—two years later—and his brother and sister argued with Grandma, she relented. But two years of being relegated to ‘servant’ status affected my mother’s already low self-esteem and I don’t think she ever recovered. When I heard the story, it made me that much more determined that I’d never let anybody stop me from what I wanted to do, just because of who I was.
Once I left home, I don’t believe I’ve ever suffered discrimination because of my ethnic background. I’ve been discriminated against because of my weight, being tattooed, and to some degree—being bisexual—more than anything else.
But yes, that, and the whole dynamic of knowing what happened to my mother, did affect my writing. In my books, there are hate groups and racism, even though it’s within an urban fantasy setting.
While some things in my world are idealized, others are not. In Otherworld, same-sex marriage? Legal and no problem to most people. Alternative lifestyles and sexualities? Maybe not the norm but just a matter-of-fact presence. But discrimination exists, and not only among the humans. My D’Artigo Sisters’ father hates one of Camille’s husbands simply because of his heritage. He’s prejudiced. And it causes a rift and he pays a price in losing his daughters’ respect.
I approach the themes of ‘other-ness’ and discrimination from a world-centric POV rather than taking it down to one ethnicity. Because I see racism and discrimination in every group, in every country, every continent, every religion, every gathering of like-individuals. There will always be a few who browbeat those who aren’t part of the ‘us’ in the us-and-them. So my writing focuses on oddballs and misfits, and those who live—like I do—a little bit on the fringe. In fact, I truly don’t know if I believe in ‘normal’ as truly existing.
I’ve always been on the outside, always been a ‘misfit’ in the norms of society. And that has made me realize how important subculture becomes. It’s also made me think about how important it is that those of us in the subculture not become exclusive. We cannot allow ourselves to take on the characteristics of those who would make us feel less-than-human, less-than-acceptable—whether it be for our ethnic heritage, or our weight, or the way we choose to portray ourselves.
So, next time you see a heavily tattooed fat chick wearing retro-pinup clothing, before making quick assumptions about her, remember: that could easily be me. ~grins~
So tell me, how do you see yourself against what is thought of as ‘normal’ in society? I’m giving a mini-book basket to one commenter (must be USA, I’m sorry), including the first three books in the Otherworld Series, the first book in the Indigo Court Series, and the first book in my Chintz ‘n China series.
You all know how this goes! Guess – which one is the lie that she told? What crazy question do you want to ask Yasmine? (Or you know, a reasonable one. Or something about her books.) And go go GO!
You guys, it’s Tuesday, dammit, and that’s what I’m sticking to. We’re all going to say it’s Tuesday, and I’m on top of things, and breathing, and it’s ok. Right? Right?! … Anyway, now that Ms. Eden Conner has had this neurotic intro, let’s get to her post before anything more happens on my part >.>
My latest release, Rain on Me, began as a question posed in a writer’s group. Someone asked, “What’s been missing from the novels you’ve read lately?” Although there were some hilarious responses, my answer was ‘weather’. Apparently, it’s always sunny in other authors’ imaginations. Then, the gauntlet was thrown: Write one scene using the missing criteria. The scene I wrote eventually became the second chapter of Rain on Me. The story is written from two, first-person points of view, that of a widowed mailman and practitioner of the Japanese art of sexual bondage, Ray Casey, and a determined, younger, detective, Zinnia Jackson. In the scene I’m sharing today, Zin fears her sister’s impending death, yet she spurns Ray’s attempt to comfort her. And a Dom denied is a Dom determined to show his little sub who’s the boss.
I’d sleep with the devil to nail the source of illegal poker machines pouring into my district. It’s personal between me and those one-armed bandits, but when my captain asked me to go undercover as a sexual submissive to catch our suspect, my gut said “Hell, no, even I can’t tell a lie that big.”
Enter Ray Casey, shibari master, who spent two weeks showing me the world of erotic bondage. I fell hard for Ray, but the outcome of our affair was preordained; duty above all.
When the unthinkable happened, where could I turn when I couldn’t trust my brothers in blue? My instincts lead me back to Ray, but he wants me to submit to something harder than a little BDS&M….
~Zinnia J. Jackson, Det. 1st Grade, South Carolina Law Enforcement Division
Tying, for me, is foreplay.
My ties weren’t elegant tonight. They didn’t have to be, to accomplish my purpose. This little poser thought she’d use sex to hold intimacy at arm’s length?
This is my game. And she was about to learn how well I played it.
“Only the Dom initiates sex,” I explained. “For you to try and manipulate me like that… well, I think perhaps you need to learn who’s in charge here.”
Leaning forward, I pressed my lips to her navel. Feeling under the table for the leg, I lashed the limb to the sturdy taper.
Her eyes were wide when I moved to the other side and repeated the action.
It was such a shame she couldn’t see me pick up the chopsticks.
I knew she felt the pressure when I placed them, one on either side of her inner folds, pointing from head to toe, because she drove her heels against the table and her back bowed.
“It’s the right, and the responsibility, of a Dom to comfort his submissive.”
Her pupils were blown, and it wasn’t lost on me that she didn’t argue. There was such a supple give to her hands, arms, and legs—a lack of fight that spoke volumes. “To refuse to be comforted….”
The twist ties I save from bread loaves were within reach, so in moments, I had the chop sticks bound together, pinching her most tender flesh.
I left her there to retrieve a couple of condoms, a bottle of lube, and a hank of thicker rope.
Returning to the kitchen, I stood by her head, where she could watch me twist the rope into an elongated knot and drop it into one of the condoms. Her tummy hollowed when I lubed the latex. Did the little minx lift her ass to help me seat the knot? Goosebumps appeared on her inner thighs when my hands brushed her skin.
Standing between her splayed thighs, I screwed the knot into place, taking my time, enjoying the sight of her dusky skin against the golden oak table, and eyeing the glistening pink of her slit.
His fingers were slick with lube. They pierced my channel without effort, a forceful thrust he accompanied by dropping his free hand over my eyes.
I sensed his anger, but if I’d wondered, the fierce way he plunged inside me removed any doubt I’d offended him. I had no time to worry about my sin. Every time he pressed into me, his wrist struck the end of the chopsticks. Each rough blow jostled my clit and delivered a searing burst of pleasure. Each retreat left me with vibrating strips of bamboo that seemed to pinch more tightly with each strike. Desire coiled inside me.
He set a hard rhythm.
Just as I grew accustomed to the feeling, he changed direction. Rather than sliding in and out, he curled his fingers and changed his motion to an up-and-down stroke. His fingertips strafed a spot that sent flashes of heat streaking through my veins and his callous force took my breath.
Now, I longed for the closeness I’d spurned outside. Ached to be held, to have my arms free so I could hold him. His scent flooded my senses, overlaid with the smell of sex—my sex.
“This,”—he growled, nearly yanking my ass off the table now—“this is the Dom’s dominion, his temple, his sanctuary, and his rightful place.” He gave his fingers a fierce twist, so I had no doubt he was talking about my channel. “You may neither offer nor withhold sex. Understand?” He renewed his up-and-down thrusting, faster than before.
What I understood was that I was on the verge of coming. “Y-yes,” I panted, an instant before unbearable pleasure suffused me. Streaks of heat sizzled through my veins and I climaxed with such force, I screamed.
“Yes, Sir.” His tone was detached. I ached to see his face. To be denied that ability while he brought such intense pleasure seemed unfair.
I managed to swipe my tongue across my dry lips. “Yes, sir.”
Ray’s hand didn’t cease moving, but he returned to the in-and-out motion. Meaning he slammed into the chopsticks again and again—agonizing, delicious torture. Another orgasm flashed through me, bowing my back. Talons of pleasure pierced me, holding me rigid, while inside, I shook helplessly. Ray kept thrusting, driving into me with such force, the table legs rattled against the floor.
My nipples felt like scorched earth. With every thrust he made inside me, my breasts shook, and in turn, the motion jostled my fingers. That movement tightened the ropes pinching my nipples, sending a sizzle of pleasure through the sensitive peaks. The knot inside my anal canal was pressed between the table and his fingers, adding a decadent layer of sensation as it rolled and twisted inside me.
In short, every erogenous spot was being touched, and all he used were two thick fingers. Recognition of that masculine power gripped me, shoving me over the edge again. Tears leaked from the corners of my eyes, and I shuddered through another orgasm.
My juices smeared my inner thighs and I felt them running down my crack. I’d never felt this kind of pleasure. The orgasms kept coming and coming, flooding me with heat, with wetness, with a white-hot thrill that bordered on pain.
I tried to grip his fingers with my muscles, to still them, but the harder I clamped down on his hand, the more aggressive his thrusts became.
I screamed. I cried. I begged him to stop, and all that did was persuade him to change directions again. There was something so brutal about the up-and-down motion, and yet, the act turned me to mush inside. I couldn’t help but respond to the rough treatment with another burst of wetness. I fought for enough breath to scream out my pleasure. Or beg for mercy.
I crested, fell, crested again, and still he forced his fingers into me. I sensed he bent his head by the warm breath sliding across my belly.
The soft stroke of his tongue warned me before he bit down on my clit. His fingertips dug into that sensitive spot inside me I hadn’t known was there.
Pain sizzled inside the small nub, a sharp but tiny pain, more unexpected than brutal. Bright colors burst behind my eyelids and the incredible pleasure was so intense, I lifted my hips, forcing his face into my mound. I’d never gushed so hard.
Then, my darkness became absolute.
I was vaguely aware when he let the ropes loose. Knew when he pulled the knot free, but I was too dazed to respond. I could barely wrap my arms around his neck when he lifted me, but when he laid me in the bed, I couldn’t let him go. The pounding in my veins gradually slowed to match the languorous rain beating the roof. Distant thunder blended with the strong beat inside Ray’s chest. I was basted in bliss and his cock was hot and hard against my belly.
His lips on my neck felt like a blessing, and forgiveness.
He slid out of the bed. I heard the water run in the bathroom. He brought back a cloth. Where was my shame? I let him pry my legs open and marveled at his gentle touch with the cloth, but the soft swipes made me shudder and wrung another tiny orgasm from me.
“I’m sorry.” I couldn’t stop crying. I thought he’d take me, roll me to my back and fuck me, but as soon as he came back to bed, his breathing slowed and his hard-on gradually subsided. My last thought before I drifted off was that he’d given me pleasure and yet taken nothing.
The realization took more than I’d meant to give.
I’m giving away one e-copy of Rain on Me. To be entered in the contest, all you need do is post your e-mail address and answer the same question that spawned this story: What’s been missing from the novels you’ve read lately? I’ll e-mail the winner to ask their preference of either Kindle or ePub format. (Please note: I do not offer the .pdf format.)
Thanks for reading!
About this author
Eden Connor graduated from Converse College with a degree in Psychology so long ago, her sheepskin is chiseled in stone. She’s been a graphic artist, a bridal photographer and an antique restorer. Since the death of her true love, she raised two children to adulthood and now has the time to return to writing. She writes primarily contemporary erotic romances, the odd bit of erotica and an occasional paranormal piece. Most of her writing is set where she lives, in South Carolina, so expect the handsome stranger to come equipped with a slow drawl. Addicted to hazelnut creamer, baseball and cranberry glass, she likes the music of Motown and when not writing about adults behaving badly, she takes a stab at the occasional needlepoint canvas.
Yay giveaway! Yay exclusive excerpt! What’d you think? 😀
You guys!!!! So … I’m still kinda on hiatus cuz pretty much nothing is figured out. [Although nobody has died since I went on hiatus, so that’s good? I guess holding steady is all I can ask for?] BUT!!! June is birthday month and that’s you know like a big deal. So … we’ll see how this goes and I hope to have it done and we’ll DO THIS okay?
And also? Today is release day for her! Whee!! So remember to congratulate her – don’t worry – I’ll add book info 😛 but without further ado, the interview!
I know you watch Investigation Discovery so … If you were a serial killer, who would be your target? And what would be your MO? [“Calling card,” what memento would you take?] Target = old men, young men, school children, college aged women, etc.
I think I’d go be a hooker, and then I’d kill anyone who treated me badly. Totally Eileen Wuornos style. Then I’d keep their keychains, because don’t you think there’s something personal about a set of keys? They’re the thing someone can’t leave the house without, you know?
Your next life you come back as a dog. What breed do you come back as and why?
I’d be a shih-tzu, but only if I could belong to an owner like me. Sleeping as many hours as I want, taken to the groomers regularly and getting free run of the furniture sounds pretty good to me. Much like my regular life, as a matter of fact.
Which celebrity is your “spirit animal?” Why?
Jennifer Lawrence. She’s me! See the faces she makes?
Or this moment, with the mint spilling and hiding. She’s completely me. You know, except for the fact that she’s young and has Oscars and it so damn gorgeous and fit. Other than that stuff, we’re completely alike.
What badass female character from TV (or books/movies) do you most want to be?
As of last night, I want to be Kacy Catanzaro. What’s that? You don’t know who she is? Why, she’s the very first woman to conquer the qualifying round of American Ninja Warrior. (If you don’t watch this show, you totally should. Incredibly in-shape people of all shapes, sizes and creeds doing physical shit that will BLOW YOUR MIND. And there’s shirtless men *every* show.) She ran up a 15 foot, inward curved wall. She is AMAZING. And only 5 foot tall. Here, just watch this.
Do you speak any other languages? What [other] language would you most like to learn and why?
I speak French only so much as two years of high school French means you know how to speak a language. Which is to say, not really at all. I would like to know how to speak it properly though. Fluently. Mostly because it can be such a pretty language, but also because I’d like to go to Paris and eat pastry and pretend I’m a native.
Hostile alien invasion, or zombie apocalypse? Which one do you think is more likely to happen? Which one is scarier?
Probably a hostile alien invasion is more likely, but I think a zombie apocalypse would be scarier. Mostly because I live in suburbia boredom land. There’s no way the aliens would bother with my area. They’d be in the bigger, cooler places where they can annihilate more humans at once.
Who are you choosing for your zombie apocalypse team? [real, then fictional?]
For my real team, can I pick Tom Hiddleston? So we can repopulate the world with beautiful babies? Or at least die trying? I mean, he is real after all.
Fictional, I’ll go with anyone from a Helenkay Dimon book. Her people are always so kickass and resourceful. Then I’ll pick up Selena and Jim from 28 Days Later, since they’ve been through this already and they’ll keep us safe. (But no one from the cast of 28 Weeks Later, because I’d be afraid their stupidity would leach into me.)
Favorite “gotta have it” drink? Alcoholic? Non-alcoholic?
I miss Coca-Cola so very, very, very much. I quit it almost two years ago. Then I moved to diet coke for a while, but I even quit that about nine months ago. I’m pretty much addicted to Canada Dry Ten and A&W Ten though. They’re my diet go-tos. Alcoholic wise, I’ve been drinking bourbon sours lately. Is that hideously geeky or retro cool? I don’t even know. I just like ’em. And didja know that most bartenders in NOLA are very generous with the bourbon? Just sayin’.
What five other authors do you think more people need to be reading? (You can assume you’re already on the list :P)
Carrie Lofty. Bwahahaa! Anyone who knows me, knows that’s a cheater answer since she’s my co-writer too.
Cara McKenna. I don’t understand how she’s not a best-seller. Her books are emotional and smart and angsty. Plus omg-dirty-filthy. In the best kind of way.
Charlotte Stein. Her voice is one of a kind, I love it so very hard. There is nothing on earth like a Charlotte Stein book.
Jennifer Echols. She’s my YA reading standby, plus she’s moved into full fledged adult romance. I’m behind on my reading (because there’s not enough hours in the day!) and it’s *killing* me that I haven’t read her Stargazer series yet.
Maisey Yates. She’s my favorite Presents writer. I love how she flips the standard tropes with so much loving care.
What’s the most interesting thing you’ve ever done for research? what’s the most interesting thing you’ve learned while doing research? In general, or for this book?
Hanging out of my trunk, trying to make sure my heroine’s wrists could be zip-tied to a support strut while she got fucked? My job, it is a strange and awesome one sometimes.
Um, the research I did for this novella had mostly to do with beer pong. The rules, the variations. What it took to win a game. You know, that kind of deep research stuff. 😉
Would you rather win the largest SuperMegaZillions lottery in history or be #1 on the NYT Best Seller list for 25 weeks?
NYT Best Seller list. *g* If I make it ten times, my 13 year old made me promise to take him to Japan. Little does he know that hitting the list once and staying there forevah is probably better! LOL
What’s the best admonishment your mom ever gave you, or that you’ve ever given a kid? e.g. if you make that face it’ll freeze like that. or… if you walk from the kitchen to the table w/ a fork in your mouth you’ll stab yourself through the throat and die
“Don’t put your arm out the window or it’ll go home in someone else’s car.” I mean, really. Has she LOOKED at how far apart cars actually drive? Or does she think my arms are 12 feet long?
What’s your favorite tv show?
Game of Thrones. Even when G.R.R. Martin breaks my heart.
(Maybe especially then.)
Now your favorite guilty pleasure secret shame show. I’m talking real housewives, the kardashians, bridalplasty, jersey shore, etc. *shudders*
My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. It’s like six year olds were given a dress budget and a pack of colored pens and told to design their dream wedding dresses. The results are AWESOMELY HIDEOUS.
What’s the most embarrassing thing to ever happen to you at school? What about at a conference?
It was the time a boy sitting behind me in an assembly reached up and touched my hair and said “Wow, you use a lot of gel. Your hair is crispy.” And my brilliant response was “I don’t use gel.” Not like I mentioned the other half-dozen kinds of mousse and hairspray I used, so he made this completely disgusted face and wiped his hands off on his jeans. Ugh.
At my first conference, I walked up to an author at the Literacy signing. I was surprised she had no line, because I’d thought she was more popular. “I love your books about [redacted],” I gushed. “You mean her,” she replied, pointing to the table next to her, which was surrounded by a line three deep on all sides. I’d gotten the right last name, and slightly different first name.
I can be such an idiot sometimes.
What do you think is the best commercial of all time?
I…don’t think I can remember one. Any. Does that make me the worst American of all time?
As a lawyer for the surf company WavePro, Bethany Harmon prides herself on being a hardworking, rational woman. She isn’t easily swayed by a charming smile and handsome face. When she’s tasked with tracking down James “Jammer” Montcrief for failing to fulfill his contractual obligations, she knows that’s exactly what she’s up against. But when the sexy playboy promises to finish the tour and teach Bethany how to surf—if she beats him in a game of beer pong—she agrees. And sinks every cup.
Now James has to pay up. Not that he minds. Little does Bethany realize, he has an ulterior motive. With delicious plans for the buttoned-up brunette, James means to give her everything she’s demanded—and much, much more…
Lorelie is offering a kindle copy of One Lesson to a lucky commenter, or any of her Samhain backlist! Whee! So now – I want to see what zany questions you can come up with to ask her! Go go go!
My dears, it is April. I am not ok with this. I need a pause and rewind button. But! No pausing or rewinding today – we’re barreling forward with Ruthie Knox! She’s here, and she chose to do an author interview, and we’re excited about that! Whoo! Yes! 😉
Really she’ll be much more entertaining – so here you go.
1. Your next life you come back as a dog. What breed do you come back as and why?
I come back as a mutt. Scrappy, medium size, with a slightly too large head. I never learn to walk on a leash, chew through collars, escape to roll in dead squirrels, steal pizza off your plate, and find and lick your panties when you are away from home. But I’m good-tempered, and the kids love me.
I’m not sure there is a why. Because that is the most awesome kind of dog to be?
2. What badass female character from TV (or books/movies) do you most want to be?
I will admit to a fondness for Sidney Bristow from Alias. Jennifer Garner’s just so cute, with her dimples and her Serious Spy Face and her badass disguises. Cannot resist her.
3. What would your superhero name be? What if you were an anti hero? What would your “anti super hero power” be?
My superhero name would need to include the suffix “licious.” Probably “Bootylicious,” because I have the booty. If I were an antihero, I would be Madame X, and my power would be to shrink people and make them live in tiny elaborate dollhouses of my own devising.
4. Chocolate covered strawberries, salted caramel chocolates, or chocolate covered chips? Which do you go to?
Salted caramel chocolates. But I only have six, and then I switch to the chocolate-covered chips because mmm, sugarsaltfat.
5. You have a one way ticket to any place in the world you want to go – outside the United States. Where do you choose to go and why?
I would need more than one ticket, because if you gave me one and I couldn’t come back or take the people I love, I wouldn’t go. But if I can take all my people with me, and they are all perfectly compliant to my wishes, I think maybe I take them to Spain. I spent a couple weeks there as a teenager and liked it enough that I can imagine being happy there. Toledo, perhaps. Or somewhere in the hot, dry middle of the country.
6. What is your favorite food? Why? And what is your “signature dish”?
I’m terrible at favorites, but if I had to pick one food to eat over and over again forever, it would probably be refried bean and cheese burritos. So I guess that is my favorite food? Or, failing that, milk chocolate.
7. You have a pet rock. What do you name it and how do you decorate it?
I name it Thomasina, and I decorate it with rhinestones, frosty pink lipstick, and a short blond shag.
8. What celebrity is your “spirit animal?” Why?
Jodie Foster is my spirit animal. She’s wicked smart, sharp, generous, courageous, and curious. She is extremely beautiful in a way that is genuine and unthreatening. And she has a refreshingly low tolerance for bullshit.
9. Sports – do you prefer participating, or spectating? And which?
I’d rather participate than spectate, but team sports are not my thing. I like all the ones you can do solitary or with a partner — running, hiking, yoga, biking, etc.
10. Do you speak any other languages? What [other] language would you most like to learn and why?
I don’t speak any languages other than English. I took a lot of Latin, which, yeah. I’d like to learn Spanish. It would make me feel like less of a privileged asshole.
11. You have to listen to the same song to 72 hours, or your family gets it. What song do you choose to listen to on repeat?
“Gotta Have You” by The Weepies.
I’ve never taken an antibiotic.
I went to college when I was sixteen.
I gave birth at home.
13. You have to be part of a reality show. Which one do you pick? Which one do you absolutely refuse to be part of? Why?
I’ll assume I can be part of any reality show ever — I’d pick The Real World. I’d also choose to be twenty years old for this exercise. It would be fun to learn exactly what brand of crazy I turned out to be in that environment. I would refuse to be on Survivor, because I am intensely noncompetitive, and I would suck at every conceivable aspect of that contest.
14. You’re only allowed to read one book for the next year. Which book do you choose and why?
I’d choose Lois McMaster Bujold’s Miles in Love, which is cheating because it’s more than one book. I’d like to read and reread those books, because they’re great, but also perfect genre fiction, absolutely perfect and brilliant. I’d learn so much.
15. What’s the most embarrassing thing that has happened to you at school? How about at a conference?
Once in high school, I went to the bathroom during lunch and came back to my regular (mixed-sex) lunch table to find everyone giggling and casting me furtive looks. I knew they’d been talking about me, but I couldn’t get them to tell me what for the longest time — and then finally one of them confessed that they’d been talking about what I would be like if I ever received oral sex, and one of the guys had done this firetruck siren noise and lifted both arms in the air like he was on a roller coaster.
Then I died.
At my first RWA conference, I met Miranda Neville and knew I’d read one of her books but couldn’t remember the name. Had her confused with Meredith Duran. Then went to the room, looked her up, still confused. Met her again later, told her which book, she pointed out that it was Meredith Duran’s book. Then I stared at her cleavage speechlessly, then left. She was very nice about it.
Isn’t Ruthie adorable? Ruthie is also very generously offering someone a copy of Roman Holiday: The Complete Adventure. (And yes – swear I will fucking pick winners! And you know … it’ll HAPPEN.)
So what questions do you have for Ms. Knox?
It’s March. It’s March and I just can’t handle this! I need a pause button, wherein I can make everyone else pause and I try to catch up. Like … reverse Sleeping Beauty. 😛 (I’m probably messing that up, aren’t I?) Anyway, it was Vivian Arend‘s birthday yesterday! And she’s our “special guest” of the month! Whee! (Also exciting, she’s one of the few who didn’t opt for the “interview.” Smart. 😉 Viv took the time out of her special day to send us this post, so I hope you chime in – and wish her a happy belated! <3
Back in senior high, one of the requirements for my Grade Twelve English was to complete a ‘major study project’. With limited interest in doing standard research, but a strong creative streak, I came up with what I thought was a fabulous solution. I proposed re-writing part of Edmund Spenser’s Faerie Queene into modern English.
It was a far more ambitious task than I’d anticipated, but something happened while I puzzled out the ancient syntax into modern terms. I fell in love with storytelling.
The words were interesting, but the pictures those words painted were more important. Shifting Spenser’s phrases into current day lingo allowed my friends to experience the wonder of the story.
Words can be beautiful. Author voices can make me smile and wish I had their skill with words, but in the end, the prettiest phrases become meaningless if they don’t tell the story.
And now, in a lighter twist, I find myself once again forced to interpret confusing words. Not olde English, but my own. See, I picked up a dictation program to help take the load off my wrists. The program works wonderfully, except when it doesn’t.
If I’m paying attention, I stop as I work and fix mistakes. Only when I’m really rolling, I don’t want to interrupt the flow, and then I end up going back over scenes a couple days later. And that’s when I have to figure out what the heck I was talking about.
Just like with Spenser, scene context can help. Thats how I knew “Beowulf and the bear” was supposed to be “a wolf and a bear”. And– “Long strands of spun gold, fresh from Russell stills skins wheel…” is also easy to parse.
But what about “Disparities in mind at all claim little height go seek”?
Seriously? I had to have been following the authors’ creed of “Write Drunk…” to come up with that one. Only now as I hit the “…edit sober” section of the command, nothing made sense.
I eventually figured it out, but it was an exciting task.
So…what do you think it means? That mysterious phrase of mine? I’ll give you the following hints: this is found in a paranormal story. The hero is a grizzly bear shifter. The heroine, a shy back bear shifter.
I have a print copy of Black Gold (book 1 Takhini Wolves) for the person who gets the closest, or makes me laugh the hardest with their guess.