Hi friends! Sorry for the delay. Totally my fault :X If you’re totally new to A Little Bit Tart, A Little Bit Sweet (ALBTALBS), you’ve been missing out on spoof were-animal stories! More recently we’ve had a specific sort, that was going up weekly, but I broke the pattern. But have no fear! Today we have the last but definitely not least installment of this “series.” So, enjoy!
Night of the Were-Hare
Of all the places to have a flat tire Clyde had to choose this stretch of lonely highway. The highway Katie’s GPS had her believing was a shortcut back to civilization. Katie kicked the front tire of her ancient 1982 Pontiac Bonneville, cursing whoever had used an air-wrench to tighten the lug nuts to the point where only someone with super human strength could loosen them. She leaned inside the open passenger side window, grabbed her cell phone off the seat, cursed again when she got exactly zero bars.
She had exactly three options. Stay on this secluded piece of shit road hoping someone who wasn’t a serial killer drove by and was willing to help. Hoof it out on her own. In the heels she had on for the wedding. Over the decaying road. For who knew how many miles. Continue reading
Hi friends! Do you remember the spoof stories from way back when? We can all thank (er, blame?) twitter for all of it. But – what inspired this round was of course, a tweet. This one right here.
Today we have David Faulkner sharing the story he wrote inspired by that image. You’ll want to read this one – promise!
“I had fuck all to do with it.” I’m getting tired of their questions and my patience has worn thin, “Now charge me or let me go.”
“You’re free to go—but don’t leave town,” the detective says to my back. Continue reading
Hi friends! Today we have Cecilia London guesting, and I almost feel that we can call her a semi-regular! You have to have an excellent sense of humor to be part of the club of ALBTALBS Spoof Stories, and I’m slowly but surely acquiring a nice collection. In fact, we’ve already got four were-specific spoof stories!
Without further ado… welcome back to ALBTALBS were-spoof shorts!
Nice Buns by Cecilia London
The fuck does a rabbit have to do to get a goddamn decent smoke around here? You’d think being immortal, and a rabbit, and a fucking awesome Creature of the Night (hello, ladies!) would get you some fucking benefits but how the fuck was I to know that cigarette taxes were fucking high in Illinois and it’s not that goddamn easy for a rabbit to waltz into a gas station and ask for a pack of Marlboros. Continue reading