She Whose Name Must Not Be Written (Contest!)

I currently feel like scooping my eyeballs out with a spoon. Which means it’s the perfect time for me to write a potentially angry and controversial post, right? (You see why I cultivate this “I’m so stupid” persona? Perhaps it’s not a persona, in fact. What if it’s true? Well that’d be crushing and I don’t want to think about it.) Side note: if you ever want to read one of my posts that isn’t crazy rambling all over the place, go find me at Heroes and Heartbreakers. There, I’m edited. Here, I’ve just got me. And I won’t tell you how very much that’s not going to happen.

There has been a lot of grumpiness on the internet lately, and well, socially. In various areas. In romance world, most notably the Susan G Komen gaffe, and then the former MTM contest. No need to discuss that here as elsewhere they’ve been covered [possibly ad nauseum]  – but I do think it’s quite healthy to “vent one’s spleen.” So I’m giving us a venue here, and in all good fun.

Remember when I whined about people not “using my name” in correspondence? Well, first of all – I’m not going to change my name. I actually thought long and hard about when I chose Limecello, and I’ve been using it for ~six years. It’s staying, come hell or high water, and people can just fucking deal. (Or not deal with me. That’s perfectly fine too.)

I’m not saying everyone has to be “formal” all the time or use polite address and all. I think it’s an issue when one is trying to be (or attempting, regardless of success, to be) professional. I mean there are multiple options. “To Whom It May Concern.” “Dear owner of Limecello/A Little Bit Tart, A Little Bit Sweet.” You know. “Dear Limecello – incidentally, what is your name?” And that’s only based on the initiation. I mean, people don’t always sign or start emails with “an address” – that’s fine. You know how sometimes you can just tell a person has a problem with you/doesn’t like you/thinks they’re superior? Yeah. That.

Megan Hart said I could just ask these persons if they have a problem with my name. I could. That’d be reasonable.

But I don’t feel like being reasonable. I feel like being young/acting my age [possibly younger!], a brat, and whatever. I think part of it is that these people are approaching me. In person, at conferences, and so on when it’s more “random” – I do give options. I actually introduce myself as Limecello, but based on a person’s reaction I give them options. I can’t see someone’s initial reactions via email. I can, however, based on continued correspondence, see if someone is a twat. (And I’m applying this to both females and males.)

So I’m going to make fun of them. And you know, myself in a way. (That makes it more fair, right?)

I want to hear reasons why someone has a problem with the name “Limecello” or addressing a person [me, obviously in this case] as Limecello. Do you think there was a mafioso named Limecello who came in destroyed this person’s family? An alien visitation wherein the extraterrestrial identified him/herself/itself as Limecello?

A horrible case of food or alcohol poisoning that somehow was traced to a batch of Limecello?

What? Entertain me! What’s the most convincing yet entertaining reason someone might refuse to address me as Limecello?

This is a continuation of the previous contest – so I’ve already got entries from Jen B., Cheryl aka inneedofvodka, Paula, Pam, Liz, June M., kiwi1124, Jane, myrandaroyann, Cathy P, Mary Kirkland, and Raonaid Luckwell. The best/most entertaining comments wins!

p.s. – If I was really clever/had the time and inclination I’d photoshop (and assuming I had that program/capability) a photo of Voldemort but make him a lime 😀

0 thoughts on “She Whose Name Must Not Be Written (Contest!)

  1. Fedora

    ROFL! I would definitely be highly entertained to see Voldemort as a lime…

    Hmm… clearly I’ve missed quite a bit–I’m just stumbling onto this, so I’d better go read the previous posts to see what the deal is! It only makes sense to me to address someone the way they prefer to be addressed–why would this be a big deal to someone?!

    Reply
  2. Tracy Faul (@tracykitn)

    In middle school, in the early 90s, I was horribly traumatized by a lime-green cello. Even today, I have difficulty keeping it together when I think back that far! Your name is a horrible reminder of a painful time in my life! I cringe every time you pop up on my twitterfeed, yet I get a perverse pleasure out of my own pain, so I can’t even bring myself to unfollow you.

    *SOB*

    How could you DO this to me!?

    Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      HAHAHAH Tracy! A secret sado-masocist?! I love this comment. And wish you’d gotten a picture of that lime green cello as well. 😉
      Perhaps you should conquer this fear/trauma by learning how to play the cello if you don’t already know how, and playing on one that is lime green!

      NB I’m not a therapist so you know, professional advice is not professional. *angelface*

      Reply
  3. Jan Terry

    LOL, my confusion is that I’m not sure how to pronounce Limecello! Is it a hard c or a soft c? Do you say it in two syllables or 4? (Lime-cello or lim-e-cell-o)? Or hey, how about Li-me-cello? You see, not as obvious as you may think! BUT, I’ve got to tell you, I’ve unsubscribed from email newsletters before when I quit reading them, but yours? I always open ’em! Love your irreverant style of reading, very refreshing! Anyway, how do you feel about a nickname? I could certainly see “Limey” for you!

    Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      Hi Jan! Three syllables, hard “c.” Yes, like the two words, lime, and cello. I think it’s why a lot of people call me Lime. 😛 Easier? Perhaps they’re lazy?!?!? Heh. Kidding. It’s actually like limoncello – the drink – but I like limes more. 🙂

      Also? Secret confession? I wanted to use limoncello but someone online already had it somewhere. Yes, I googled. Despite that person not being in the romance community I wanted to be unique. Now though, more people are stealing it! >:(

      LOL Maybe next time I should run a “Trademark Name?” Contest.

      Hehehe Jennifer Haymore calls me Limey. 🙂 She’s the only one though – most people go with Lime when it comes to nicknames. And there- contest #3; nicknames! ;D

      Reply
      1. Limecello Post author

        kiwi – hah – yes, it’s a popular one. Now, I’d be really amused if one of those Limoncello restaurants served like …. O_o I don’t even know.
        Um… Tibetan food? [I tried to come up with the most unlikely cuisine] 😛

        Reply
  4. Ellie Heller

    No! Please, don’t change your name! I’d never recognize you if you weren’t Limecello. If you didn’t you’d be forever hearing, ‘oh, you’re Limecello aren’t you?’ Which’ll make you grind your teeth and wonder *why* you bothered changing it in the first place. So, to save the aggravation, and dental expense, keep the name.

    My two cents.

    Reply
      1. Limecello Post author

        lol roger wilco, Ellie! (It never actually was an option, the name change. Others might wish it, but it’s not going to happen.)

        Now another name, on the other hand… 😉 Endless possibilities! *hee*

        Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      You and Froggie, Silver! … *narrows eyes* You’re not Froggie are you? (You aren’t.) >.> … <.<

      but that's what she always says/calls me! 😛

      And my goodness. Can you imagine? If people have a tough time calling me Limecello I don't even know how LimeJello would go over.

      Reply
  5. Limecello Post author

    p.s. – You’re welcome to enter multiple times. In fact, I hope you will. Any time anything hilarious, or awesome pops into your head, post it!

    The REAL purpose of this is to have some fun.

    So go go go!!!

    Reply
  6. Ellie Heller

    Oh! I’ve got the prefect answer. Bribe Los Del Rio to rename the Macarena to the Limecello. Then, you’d have an international hit with your name on it and a dance everyone will do at weddings. Then people be begging you to keep the name.

    Or maybe begging you not to *keep* it.

    I can just hear it now “Oooooh, Limecello”. Dang that’s going to be stuck in my head all night. 🙂

    Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      Ellie – your comment made me laugh! Oh my goodness, I can’t imagine a dance called the Limecello. Even if it was the Macarena! 😉 But don’t you think it deserves its own dance?

      Also, I dare you to somehow record that song!

      Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      LOL a symbol? Too bad there isn’t an “S” in my name, because I could make it a dollar sign like Ke$ha! That would be KLASSY. Or, excuse me. I mean KLA$$Y.

      Hehehhee.

      Reply
  7. Mary Preston

    What were you thinking? It’s an affront to humanity. My grievance stems from the fact that I now can’t name my first born Limecello because it is no longer unique. Did you consult with me before taking this upon yourself? Nay says I!!! I can’t bear to think that you have ruined all my chance at happiness. SOB!! No, that is not an acronym for an insult , though if you take it to mean that I can’t stop you. No-one can stop you from doing anything it seems.

    (This was so much fun. I wish you well & don’t fret, because we think the world of you.)

    Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      Mary your comment made me lauuugh!!! The subtle SOB only not really but yes it is. ;D Well done, you!

      And you know, you’re right. I should create a bunch of socks and run around claiming all sorts of names – AND TRADE MARK THEM! I mean, if Beyonce and JayZ can do it, why not Limecello!? ;P

      Reply
  8. Renee Brown

    Congratulations on the rant! What were we thinking? Of course, Limecello is a name and a great one! Keep it and the others can just go ……. You get the idea. I know! We can rename the Eiffel Tower the Limecello Tower – Who says we need to rename something minor, Take it to the top and rename a well-known icon because obviously, you are (or should) be as well known. After all, famous is as famous does!

    Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      Famous is as famous does! Love it, Renee! And oh my goodness – could you imagine saying “I’m going to the Limecello Tower?” :X Somehow I’m associating it with the Tower of London… but I’m nice! I swear! … Well, niceish

      That could be an extremely fun game too – what thing/things to rename Limecello. 😀 I like the Grand Canyon, personally. Don’t you think “the Grand Limecello” has a nice ring to it?

      Reply
  9. Liz

    I got sick once on kamizakes, but I’m not having flashbacks or refusing to name the shot! I do adore your unedited blogging self. I’m glad you’re not changing.

    Now as far as why these rude people refuse to say your name, I’m going the route of childhood trauma. I think that as they lay in their little beds at night, the boogeyman in the closet and the monster under the bed whispered with voices straight from the darkest depths, “limecellooooo”.

    Now they’re struck dumb with terror whenever they see you or stumble upon your name. 🙂

    And really, can you find a way to photoshop voldemort and a lime? I’d love to see that. Keep blogging away. You’re my favorite Elle/Lime/Limey/Cello-y person and I will always say your name with a smile.

    Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      Liz – I’ve never had a kamikaze, but I remember seeing the drink recipe. (I always like looking stuff up before I go to bars – or while I’m in them, because I don’t drink beer, and my friends love dive bars, so it takes some dealing with the bartenders!)

      I’m laughing so hard! And yet your childhood trauma story has merit. I mean how creepy would it be to hear someone/thing whispering “limecello” in the dead of night?!

      *shivers*

      And! Re: the photoshop, did you see what Pam did? Someone said “that wins the internet” 😀

      Reply
  10. Avery Flynn

    Well, obviously, it goes back to the great family feud of the Lime and Cello families. It was a devious war. The Limes would try to poison the Cellos but could only come up with concoctions that would make the Cellos’ mouths purse and the little spot beneath their ears winge in pain. For their part, the Cellos would fire up the strings and play a continuous medley of early 80’s Europop tunes until the Limes were rolling on their floors in the fetal position. This feud ended only when the Romeo-and-Juliet-like romance of a pair of garden gnomes turned into an urban fantasy role playing game during with a rogue band of gnomes wiped out the entire Lime and Cello families. Or so they thought. All that was left was a fledgling website, Limecello, born from the ashes of the Lime and Cello families. The haters are the gnomes descendants who pledge on the eve of their thirteenth birthdays to always loathe the Limecello.

    Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      I! LOVE! THIS! Also, Avery, I think you have the premise of your next story. Um, you’re welcome. I mean hello, instant best seller! 😉

      Imho the cellos are the real villains here. I mean, 80’s Europop tunes?! I shuddered a little even typing that. *shudders again*

      And the pledge on the 13th birthday is really the perfect topper. I mean hello, we’re talking series now! Whole generations of hatergnomes to be defeated!

      Reply
  11. June M.

    Even though I am already entered, The only reason I can think of that someone would refuse to call you Limecello or Lime would be if they absolutely hate limes. Because they would not want to call you that cause they love you so much!

    Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      Nice! Definitely a very logical explanation, June. I mean, who wouldn’t love me?! *peers around furtively at the cloudy grey sky for lightning strikes* 😉

      Reply
      1. Pam

        Thanks.
        I showed the image to my sister and she busted out laughing, even though I told her what it was before she looked at it and she said something about it reminding her of the Grinch. LOL I have no idea why she’d think that other than the fact it’s green. Who knows. She’s weird. 😀

        Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      PAM! OH MY GOSH!!!!

      I linked to this and someone said “that wins the internet” – which you do!!!

      You are so awesome, and I’ve been bragging about how amazing my blog friends are. Because that? Is incredible.

      p.s. – *whispers* I think it’s time your sister watch/re-watch Harry Potter!

      Reply
      1. Pam

        Thank you! You know, I do like winning things. LOL 😀

        I feel a bit rusty with regards to working with Photoshop and I’ve been trying to do some graphics here and there to get back into it. So this was a fun little thing for me to try.

        I told my sister what you said and she was like “can’t you see it?” with regards to it looking like the Grinch and I was like, no, not really. LOL

        Reply
  12. Lynda K

    After watching the Superbowl, perhaps their aversion stems from seeing too much Cee-Lo Green in a caftan?? I mean, had it actually been a green one, he would have kinda sorta looked like a huge lime…….. *shrug*

    Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      Lynda, I snorted when I read your comment. Oh my gosh wasn’t Cee-Lo’s… I don’t even know what to call it – caftan is good sparkly? Now I almost wish he wore a green one. It might’ve been too much for the universe to handle though.

      Although! I mean, who wouldn’t love a giant sparkly green lime?! How could that be a bad thing? ;X

      Reply
  13. kiwi1124

    I say maybe it’s because on spring break in Tijuana they had one too many tequilas and lime while listening to that horrible music. When did mariachi band members start playing the cello anyway?

    Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      Kiwi, I… well I wouldn’t actually, but I was going to say I’d pay money to hear/see a mariachi band with a cello. I think my ears might cry though.

      And – that’s why said person should like me/Limecello! Cuz it’s vodka all the way here! 😉 [Actually personally I like tequila as well. Growing up, my parents sometime cooked with it! There’s a foodie secret from me to you!]

      Reply
  14. eli yanti

    i think pseudonym is cool, i even cant find a better name and cant make it ;(

    so dont change it, i think limecello is great, make me time about “lime” and “cello” 🙂

    Reply
  15. Mary Kirkland

    I hate to say it, but Limes give me the heebie jeebies. I’ve seen them do things when we aren’t looking. I know, I know…you don’t believe me either but I have proof this time! *I won’t be spending time in that padded cell this time*
    http://scarymarythehamsterlady.blogspot.com/2012/02/limes-give-me-heebie-jeebies.html

    Just look at what the limes do when we aren’t watching! *I knew I wasn’t seeing things like that stupid therapist said I was*

    Reply
    1. Limecello Post author

      Oh my gosh! Kiwi!!! Hahahha >.< I can't stop laughing, while I’m saying “oh my gosh, that’s so creepy!!!”

      *hugs self and shivers*

      There is no way that… *that* would be called limecello! *sniffs* You’re just trying to… O_o … something… defame me…

      Reply
  16. librarypat

    Just maybe I like orangecello better than lemoncello, and that better than applecello, so limecello is way down on the list of what I want to deal with. So, no offense, but when I develop a taste for limecello, I’ll let you know.

    Reply
  17. Pat L.

    Maybe because limes usually end up rotten in my veg/fruit bin forgotten about. But nobody can forget you; You write some great blogs.

    Reply
  18. Pingback: Winners!!! And – Your Call « Limecello

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