You guys – Jess Dee is amazing. She has been nothing but patient and kind and you know, a fantabulous author, so I’m thrilled to have her visiting with us today! She’s the special author for November! Whee!! (Although holy hell how did it get to be so late in the year already?!)
If you missed it, you should check out the spoof story Jess Dee and Mari Carr wrote specifically for us at ALBTALBS! An original work! Yes! For you!
And for her guest post, Jess chose an author interview, ALBTALBS style. 😀 I hope you enjoy.
You have to be a nun, a kindergarten teacher, or a trash[woman] for a week. Which do you pick and why?
Oh, man. I have to be one of these?
Yikes. Okay, well I have no choice but to select my answer by process of elimination.
I write erotic romance, so I could never be a nun.
I don’t have the patience to handle my own kids for a day, so a kindergarten teacher isn’t gonna work.
I guess that leaves trashwoman – or as we call them here in Australia, a garbo.
Did you ever wake up laying on the sidewalk in front of a McDs in Tokyo at 5 AM after a night of drunken debauchery? If yes what were you doing? If no – tell us – what do you imagine it would take for such a thing to happen?
Oh, I did. I did. Just the once. But I was sworn to secrecy, and have thus promised never to tell anyone the how or the whys of it all.
It’s a pity, coz it’s a really, really good story. *coughs* cop out *coughs*
What is your spirit animal?
I wasn’t sure, so I went online and did a bit of research. Turns out my spirit animal is the deer.
That one surprised me. I always just figured it was a lion or leopard. Or maybe even an eagle.
(You too can find your spirit animal, by clicking here. It’s fun.)
Now, if you had to become an animal, which would it be?
A bottle-nosed dolphin.
In fact I always kind of figured if there is such a thing as reincarnation, I’d come back in my next life as a dolphin.
What’s the first type of alcohol you tried? Is there a story there?
To be honest, I don’t know what it was. I was young (like 5 or 6) and at a big family gathering and I spotted a glass of coke on the table. Knowing I wasn’t allowed coke (waaaaay too unhealthy), I looked all around to make sure my mom wasn’t watching, then snuck a huge sip.
Yep, it was coke – but that wasn’t all. There was something else in there too. Something very bitter and very strong and possibly the worst thing I have ever tasted in my life. Took me a long time to ever taste coke again. *Haaa I have a similar story with Sprite! … Didn’t take me that long to drink Sprite though as soda [pop!] was such a treat.
Walk in pantry, walk in closet, or extra garage space?
I’m sorry, I refuse to choose between extra pantry or extra closet space. I need them both.
What do you think is the best commercial of all time?
My first choices are all old South African commercials that I can’t even find on YouTube to share with you.
This “Big Ad” is probably my favorite Aussie choice:
What super power would you most like to have?
I want to fly. I would love to fly.
I’m not sure there’s a super power I wouldn’t want. (Does that make me a power hungry cow?)
You’re a character in a fairy tale. Which story and which character do you pick?
I want to be Prince Cahrming. Not because I secretly wish I was a man, but because, damn it, the prince always has the best life. He lives in a castle, goes on amazing adventures, is a brave hero, has loads of friends (and gold), there’s always someone watching his back, he has women falling at his feet, and he unfailingly finds the one perfect person to love.
Seriously, you couldn’t get more fairy tale perfection than that.
You’ve been cursed as a Disney villain. Who would you most want to be?
Shere Khan from the Jungle Book.
Or maybe Shenzi, the hyena from the Lion King.
What three dead authors would you invite to a dinner party?
What’s the best admonishment your mom ever gave you, or that you’ve ever given a kid? e.g. if you make that face it’ll freeze like that. or… if you walk from the kitchen to the table w/ a fork in your mouth you’ll stab yourself through the throat and die.
“Don’t eat corn before you swim. It will swell in your tummy and you’ll drown.”
Really, Ma? Really?
If you have to listen to a song 24/7 for four days, which one would you choose?
Ack! I don’t know. I wouldn’t choose a song I love, coz I’d only end up hating it, and if I chose a song I hated it would drive me to drink.
I think I’d have to go for something that I have no opinion about one way or the other. Maybe a Beethoven symphony. (Does that count?)
You can only eat three things for the rest of your life – prepared the same way – what do you pick?
Breakfast, lunch and dinner.
How’d you come up with your author name?
I combined the first name (Jess) and the nickname (Dee) of two of three people I love most in this world.
In a death match, who would win? A Ninja or a Viking?
I’m going to have to go with Viking here, but only because the only Viking I know is Eric the Vampire from Sookie Stackhouse, and as far as I’m concerned, it doesn’t matter what contest you put him in, he will always win!
Thanx for having me over, Lime.
More than Words
He’s just seen the one thing that was meant for her eyes only.
More Than, Book 3
Molly Harris never intended to send that letter. It was only meant to be a secret record of her true feelings for her boss, gorgeous pediatrician Sam Shepard. But in the chaos of a crazy day at work, Molly accidentally hits “send” instead of “delete”.
Mortified by her mistake, Molly acts in the only way she can. She submits her notice of resignation. A professional-etiquette line’s been crossed, and there’s no going back.
Sam’s mouth goes dry—then it waters—when he discovers his receptionist has sent him a dirty love letter. Or to be more explicit, a wicked, erotic love letter, neatly outlining her many fantasies involving him.
Now Sam has two choices. Either he can be the ultimate professional and accept Molly’s resignation, or he can acknowledge the depths of his desire and maybe, just maybe, convince her to send him another saucy email…
Warning: Could cause the uncontrollable urge to write—and receive—dirty love letters. But proceed with caution…you’re going to want to act on those letters. Immediately.
Jess has also offered one lucky commenter her choice of Jess’s books – one, or potentially a series. In the digital format of her choice. (Or his – have we ever had a male win? Anyway.) We’ll see how this goes and how nice all of you are to me. 😉
Howdy! Would you like a Coke and Jack for old time’s sake?
Oh, God, Denise, my stomach just curdled.
Great interview…the don’t eat corn and swim comment had me lol
And you know what’s amazing, Timitra?
I believed it for the longest time!
LOL I absolutely love this interview! It’s so relaxed and funny. 🙂
Aw, thanx, Ki Pha.
My Mother used to say that about the fork. She also said it about knives too. In her defence I did cut my tongue once. I did NOT tell her. I’d still be hearing about it.
There’s a little common sense in that admonishment. Specially if you accidentally trip and fall on said knife or fork while you’re walking…
>.> I lick knives clean …
Jess aren’t you glad I kept [most] of my comments to myself? 😀
And thank you thank you for playing along and being such a good sport <3 <3 Love having you as a guest here! 🙂
You had more snarky comments, Lime???
Hmmm, now I’m curious about them…
And thank you for having me over. I <3 playing here.
Nice book covers
Thanx, bn100. I love my covers.
Jess is the best! 🙂 And so is Lime! So clearly this was an interview made in heaven 😉 Thanks, you two!
Fe, if we’re the best, then we’re right up there with you.
Great interview! Looking forward to reading your work, Jess! 🙂
Hope you enjoy it, Emily. 🙂